Teaching Mama, Part 2

March 22, 2013 Jennifer Boster

Off

I am loving all of the wonderful comments on yesterday’s post about teaching when you have your own children. It seems to be a topic that is on many readers’ minds – and so many of you had such great input! I wanted to follow up with a summary of some of the excellent ideas YOU had, and address a couple of other questions/topics.

Here are some of the many great ideas/suggestions from readers:

my daughter & her friend LOVE the piano!

1. Take a break from teaching while your children are young. As they enter school, gradually pick up students again. Excellent plan – I think this is a great way to do both jobs fully.

2. It is CRUCIAL to have the support of your spouse. I couldn’t agree more! If your teaching is a priority in your home, then you must work together on figuring out how to make it work.

3. Decide beforehand how many students you can commit to. Great comment – I have often turned down students because I simply couldn’t take the time away from my kids. But it is sometimes hard to turn down extra students/income! It’s good to figure out beforehand how much time you can really commit to.

4. Teach in the early mornings. I have not tried this (probably because I am not a morning person!) but what a wonderful idea! Another creative scheduling plan to allow for piano teaching and parenting.

5. Be upfront and professional about your children. I loved the comment from a reader who states in her policy that her child will always be watched by someone. The times when my children have not had someone watching them have been hard. Even though it can work (and as a parent you’ve got to plan to be flexible), your students are paying you for your professional services. Those are always the times that make me re-evaluate things and change my schedule.

6. Make a maternity leave plan for your students. I loved a reader’s comments about ideas for her students during her maternity leave – hold some type of competition for learning scales and pieces, have them attend a seminar by her piano tuner, etc. For more great ideas, read contributor Bonnie Jack’s great article about maternity leave for piano teachers.

7. Childcare in exchange for piano lessons. One reader talked about a situation where two families from her church watched her children, while she taught all of theirs – for $8 a lesson, because her kids were being watched at the same time. (Aside from the low tuition rate, not too bad of a set-up, although I wonder how quiet it is during the lesson with so many kiddos running around!) She also wondered if I charge less for “poor” people. This could be an entire post on its own, but I wanted to quickly address it and see what others think…

I charge all of my students the same amount. Sure, a discount should be in order if they watch your children during the lessons, but I think you do need to be careful that you are not undercharging too drastically. A couple of reasons:

1) The less you charge, the less professional you seem – and the less seriously the students/parents will take the lessons and the commitment required. People will take you more seriously if you charge a more professional rate.

2) Your time is so precious, especially as a mama! Make those times away from your kids worth it. Be a good, professional teacher, work hard, get paid what you’re worth, and then enjoy your free time with your kids.

If I gave discounts to everyone who asked for them, it would not be worth my time; I’d be seriously shortchanging myself and my abilities, and really doing a disservice to the profession and to the families I teach. (I think when you stay at your higher, professional rate, they expect more and will work harder. If you give more and truly are a great teacher, they will value it more and practice more.) I have given free months of lessons away at church auctions/charity events, but I don’t give discounts for people, even if I teach 2 or more of their children. I think that I would consider a scholarship program for a student if and only if they: are VERY motivated to practice, have VERY supportive parents who understand the importance of music lessons and consistent practice, who truly make great progress, and are truly financially are in need. Yes, I would give a small discount in exchange for them (a parent or sibling) watching my children during the lesson.

And some thoughts of my own –

ON PROFESSIONALISM
Yes, I have taught lessons when my children were home, and playing quietly in the other room or sometimes in the room. This is definitely not ideal – for me as a teacher, or me as a mother. In situations like this, I feel that I am doing both jobs – that of a piano teacher, and that of a mother – half-way, and something has got to change. Yes, my kiddos are my #1 priority. I always, always prefer and plan to have somebody watching them (or to teach while they are asleep). But, sometimes life happens, my husband has a big test to study for, or has to TA or has something come up, and my kiddos are home while I teach. In such cases, flexibility is important. But at the same time, I need to be as professional as possible in my piano teaching, and I know that my children can disrupt that. That is why, when you are a piano teacher AND a mother/father, you need to know where to draw the line. You need to know when to call and cancel a lesson, knowing that if that student came, it would not be a good/professional situation. I have, many times, been asked to watch somebody’s child, but had to turn it down because I had a piano student coming that afternoon – I can’t do both at once! It is SO not fair to the piano student. Your students pay you for your professional services and for your full attention. If you know you are going to be too distracted from the lesson, you need to fix it or reschedule the lesson on your own time.

CANCELLATION/MAKE-UP POLICY
As a parent and a piano teacher, you have GOT to have in place a good cancellation/make-up policy, taking into account that things will come up with your own children. I have had to cancel SO many more lessons as a mother than I ever, ever did before, simply because my kids tend to get sick! When sickness or other things in your family come up (watching a family members’ kids, school functions, etc.), you need to have a plan, in your policy, for what to do when YOU have to cancel a lesson. I’d say that it is much better to cancel a lesson than to have a student come when your house is crazy and your full attention is not on the student. I like to put into place in my semester’s calendar specific “make-up days” for times like this when I need to cancel. I normally don’t make-up lessons missed by students (except in extenuating circumstances, which I understand), but I ALWAYS make-up lessons that I cancel.

SCHEDULING FLEXIBILITY
In the past few years I have found a great way to keep all lessons a little more flexible, allowing for those times when my child needs my attention during a lesson. I schedule an extra 15 minutes of music theory practice/instruction on the studio computer at each lesson (paid for through a yearly “technology fee” per student). If my evening student arrives and my children are not quite tucked into bed, I have them do their computer time first, allowing for me to finish up my motherly duties and get my kiddos all settled. If a student arrives and my husband is watching my children, I do the lesson first, and then they do their computer time afterwards (at which time I can relieve my husband and grab my baby for a cuddle). This has worked so well in allowing a little bit of flexibility at every lesson.

FOLLOW YOUR HEART

As cheesy as that may sound, I think it is really important. I love teaching, I really do. But I knew it was time to drastically reduce the number of private students I taught when I started to dread those afternoons when I taught. When I found that I would rather be out there playing with my kids than in my studio teaching, I knew it was time for a change. And yes, it was very hard to give up that extra income, but it is definitely worth it. This is a season of my life to slow down on the piano teaching and focus on my kids. I know there will be many other seasons to come that I will have more time to devote to private teaching, and many ways now that I can continue my teaching – whether I am teaching a little preschool music class and singing little songs about train rides and rivers, or whether I am teaching my own children to love music, or teaching an occasional student here or there. I am a music teacher for life, but a mother forever.

Piano Teaching Q&A: Maternity Leave

January 11, 2011 Jennifer Boster

2 Comments

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I am due with my 3rd child in about a month and currently have 8 piano students ages 7-11. They are all in the Primer Bastien book, except 2, who are in level 1. As important as my piano students and their success is to me, my family comes first, so I have been thinking of taking a break for about a month to adjust to the new baby. I’m due January 26th, so I was going to just teach through January until the baby comes and then start up again in March. I would love to get your input and advice on how to make this break time not hinder the progress of my students and what kinds of things to give my students to work on while I’m out. I welcome any suggestions and thank you in advance for your help.
Sincerely,
Haley Castillo

Hi, I just had my second baby a few months ago, so this is fresh on my mind. I’m exhausted! Good luck with your third! I hope I can answer this in a way that will apply to other teachers as well. There are a couple of different ways to handle a maternity leave. One is to find a substitute teacher to teach your students while you are gone, and the other is to just give your students a break for a while.

Substitute

If at all possible, I recommend finding a substitute teacher to take your students while you are recovering and adjusting to life with a new baby. Brainstorm possibilities for someone who might be able to do this: do you have a younger sibling who would like to learn to teach? Do you have any nearby relatives or friends with teaching experience or a good piano background? What about piano teachers in your neighborhood? Maybe an older person who used to teach and might enjoy a short-term return to the trade? Consider that someone who is less experienced than you will appreciate the opportunity and training, but may not push your students as hard as you would. On the other hand, someone with more experience than you should be able to keep your students challenged, but might be more expensive, and honestly, you could lose some students who may decide to transfer to the substitute’s studio permanently. There are bound to be drawbacks with anyone you choose, but it will usually still be better than losing the momentum by giving your students a month or two off of lessons entirely.

Once you have a list of a few possibilities, contact each one of them to gauge their interest and availability. Let them know how many weeks you are planning to take off, what your current teaching schedule is, and what tuition your students are currently paying. Ideally, it would be great to find someone who can maintain the same schedule and tuition your students are used to, but minor adjustments may have to be made.

Once you have arranged with someone to be your substitute, contact each of your students to let them know what you have set up. Tell them when and where their lessons will be, who they should make payment to (if you already have a good payment system in place, it might work best for them to continue to pay you, and you can just write one check to the substitute), and any other details you have worked out with the substitute. The smoother you can make this transition for your students, the less likely you are to lose any of them in the process.

Write some notes about each student for the substitute teacher. Let them know how long the student has been playing, what pieces they are working on, what skills they need to focus on, what your practice expectations are, what your reward systems are, etc. If your students will be ready to start any new literature during your absence, select that literature ahead of time and let the substitute know when to assign it. The more info you can give the substitute about your students and your systems, the smoother the transition will be for everyone involved. But keep in mind that every teacher does things differently, and the substitute will probably do some things with your students that you wouldn’t have done. And that’s okay; you might even learn something!

No substitute

If you can’t find anyone that you feel good about teaching your students while you are gone, then it can work to give your students a break for a while. You run the risk of losing some who might decide not to come back once they get out of the habit of lessons, and you will absolutely have to do a little backtracking to re-teach lost skills, but there are a few things you can do to minimize the negative impact of this time off.

Let parents know exactly when lessons will start up again. If you give them a date to put on their calendars, they are more likely to view this as a break instead of a stopping point with an optional restart.
Give students weekly assignments to complete while you are gone. Maybe they can pass off a song to a parent each week, master a new technique exercise, or complete a theory game or coloring page during their regular lesson time.
Don’t treat your time off like a break for the students. If they get out of the habit of practicing while you are on leave, they might not get back in. It’s likely they won’t practice as well as usual, but expect them to, and they might. Especially if they have weekly goals they know they need to complete.
It might help to make a calendar showing the weeks you will be gone, and to write assignments and goals directly on the calendar. Maybe younger students would enjoy crossing off the days on the calendar, or putting a sticker on each day that they practice.
Enlist the parents’ help in keeping the practicing consistent and in meeting weekly goals.
See if you can think of a fun and different assignment for the students to do while you are gone—maybe have them write a composition, do a research project about a composer, or write a story about two music notes named Fred and Harry (yeah…I’m sure you can come up with something better than that…)
Depending on what you think you are up for, you might consider making a phone call to each family once or twice during your time off, just to check in and see how practicing and other assignments are going. This can help parents and students recommit if they have slacked a bit.
Send a birth announcement to each family so they will be thinking about you! (I’m mostly kidding about this one…who has time to send birth announcements after their 3rd child?)

I hope this helps a little. Obviously there are lots of details that could be handled differently, and you will need to think carefully about each of your students and what will be best for them. I hope other teachers will add their ideas in the comments!

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